Dear Martha Stewart Ladies,

You know who you are…

The creative ladies.

The ones who can perfect any makeup trick out of a magazine with seemingly no effort.

The ones who can bake that gluten-free cake from the recipe book AND make it taste good on the first try.

The ones who pull a kid’s craft off of Pinterest and makes it look like a professional work of art.

The ones who sell beautiful, handmade jewelry on Etsy and make a good living doing it.

The ones who can sew the most beautiful things I’ve ever laid eyes on.

The ones who seem to never fail no matter what womanly endeavor they set their eyes on.

I’ll be honest here…

Sometimes, I don’t like you

How are your vehicles so ridiculously clean?

How is it that you feed your friends or family a new dish that they love every single time you try?

How is it that you are always put together with gorgeous clothing, jewelry and makeup?

How is it that your dorm, apartment or house is decorated to perfection?

What is your secret?

Did I miss something?

Every time I put on makeup, I look like a raccoon.

My apartment is sanitary, but has clutter.

My car looks like Toys-r-us exploded in it.

I can’t even cut straight with a pair of scissors.

I can bake gluten-free, but only because my husband taught me.

Sometimes I wonder if your life is really as perfect as it seems.

My instincts tell me no.

I bet that the snapshots I see of your life as just that : snapshots.

I’m sure your house is clutter sometimes too. I’m sure you’ve hidden burnt or otherwise uneatable food in your trash can too. Maybe you even have a few “Pinterest fails” under your belt, like me.

That’s okay.

You’ll still be inspiring to me.

New Crunchy Mom

P.S. If you ladies are holding out on me with some sort of magic fairy dust that cleans your house and cooks, I’m going to send Bubba’s boogers to your house.  😉

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